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Macleans Magazine suggests should-be new Dictionary words for 2009

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by Scott Feschuk
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As the year winds down, let’s reflect on the pivotal personalities of 2009 and reveal the Fourth Annual List of Words That Ought to be Added to the Dictionary.

ahmadinejad vb. 1. to threaten violence upon one’s neighbour: Once spring arrived, Jason ahmadinejaded the Johnsons until they took down their Christmas lights.

baird n. 1. single-minded hostility. 2. hostile single-mindedness. 3. one who, based on his demeanour, can be assumed to type emails exclusively using CAPITAL LETTERS.

balloon-boy adj. ill-conceived, unwise: The slapdash coalition of opposition parties turned out to be a balloon-boy fiasco.

 berlusconi n. the inability to keep it in one’s pants: You’ve got chronic berlusconi, the doctor told John Mayer.

boyle vb. 1. to surprise based on physical appearance: His well-oiled abs glistening under the fluorescent lamps, Ridge boyled all present  by sequencing the human genome. 2. to be radically made over by a high-priced team of stylists, hairdressers and makeup artists, the result somehow being an increase in one’s homeliness.

coderre n.1. a persistent droning. 2. one whose every declaration prompts eye-rolling in others. ant. class, dignity, silence.

donolo n. a perceived messiah: The U.S. government stepped in as donolo to the failing General Motors.

gosselin n. the sound of one’s 15 minutes of fame elapsing. vb. (usu. prec. by kate) to wear upon one’s head a porcupine.

gretzky vb. to be grossly overpaid when judged against the results one has achieved: Given box-office returns, Will Ferrell has been gretzkying since the end of 2006.

harper n. a Tim Horton’s employee: Put on two extra harpers to handle the morning rush.

heatley adj. whining, griping, bellyaching: Even a warm bottle of formula could not soothe the heatley baby.

ignatieff n. a bad situation getting worse: After beginning the season with 14 straight losses, the team suffered the ignatieff of an injured starting goalie. syn. dion. vb. to regret a career decision: Anyone who’s seen the trailer suspects The Rock will ignatieff starring in Tooth Fairy.

karlheinz vb. from the German, meaning “to be wished dead by the large-chinned baritone.”

layton vb. to oppose someone or something time and time again, right up until opposing it would actually result in a consequence: Joan opposed premarital sex, but laytoned when Brad Pitt showed up soaking wet at her door.

letterman n. the urge to change the channel during an awkward televised moment: I felt an overwhelming letterman when Sarah Palin couldn’t name a single newspaper or magazine.

macdonnell n. a gaffe of forgetfulness. syn. bernier.

madoff vb. to orchestrate an elaborate scheme designed to conceal the truth: By successfully executing a smile, Stephen Har­per madoffed the existence of his robotic circuitry.

mulroney vb. to explain, unconvincingly: The teenager mulroneyed that the joint found in his pocket belonged, in fact, to Matthew McConaughey. n. a commercial establishment that accepts neither cheques nor credit cards: I want to buy these apples but the vendor’s a mulroney—cash only.

obama vb. to exhaust, usu. in  a short span of time, one’s supply of goodwill. n. a rare medical condition in which one is conjoined to a teleprompter.

oprah vb. to announce you’re going to do something, but then to not do it for two years: Covered in Cheetos dust, Amir oprahed on about losing weight, then heated up a burrito.

polanski vb. to travel to Switzerland, unwisely.

rae vb. to become more attractive as an option in retrospect: The filet mignon raed in Diana’s mind once she’d tasted the salmon.

raitt adj. sexy, hot. syn. radioactive leaks, cancer.

sanford vb. to proffer a highly dubious explanation. My wife smashed in my car windows to rescue me, Tiger Woods sanforded.

sully (also: sullenberger) n. one who need never pay for a drink again.

twitter n. a technological breakthrough that frees one of the need to be physically present in the company of others in order to bore them.

usain vb. to move with blazing speed: The Prime Minister usained dozens of Conservative flunkies to the Senate.

woods n. an abrupt reversal of fortune: I was up $300 at blackjack but since the new dealer arrived, I’ve had a real woods of a time. vb. to commit infidelity exclusively with those significantly less attractive than your spouse.

internet site reference: LINK

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Written by thecanadianheadlines

December 27, 2009 at 8:51 am

Tiger Woods admitted ‘marriage a sham’ – Lover

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by Reuters staff writers
Tiger Woods Nike

Tiger Woods tips his Nike cap on the 18th hole during the final round of the 2007 Masters golf tournament / AP Source: AP

  • Nike says it will stand by Woods
  • Other sponsors leaving due to infidelity
  • Wife spotted not wearing wedding ring

TIGER Woods used the title of a Killers song as an alias when calling his latest alleged mistress, her former boyfriend claims.

Julie Postle, 25, has been identified as the young waitress who Woods wooed at Orlando’s Roxy Nightclub.

They met at the nightclub five years ago and Woods allegedly explained that his marriage was a sham.

“She said Tiger told her that his marriage was for publicity,” her former boyfriend Brian Kimbrough said.

“She said it was for his image and the tabloids and wasn’t real.”

According to Mr Kimbrough, Woods would use the alias “Mr Brightside” when he called, taking the name from a Killers song about a jealous lover.

Up to 12 women have been linked to the star, who has taken an indefinite break from golf to rebuild his marriage.

The revelation comes after New York single mum Cori Rist claimed Woods invited her to meet him in Australia.

Ms Rist, 31, said the globetrotting Woods had invited her to meet him in California, Dubai and Australia but she refused.

Woods is said to have flown another of his lovers, Rachel Uchitel, to Australia last month when he was in Melbourne for the Australian Masters.

“He pursued me and invited me to numerous places and I did not go. I felt guilty when I saw the picture of his wife and his child and I had convictions,” Ms Rist said.

Ms Rist suspected Woods was seeing other women during their two-and-a-half year affair, which started in August 2006.

“I’d wake up in the night and he would be texting. I’d ask him what he was doing and he would say he was checking emails.

“I had this feeling, I knew it was something bigger.”

They met in June 2006 when one of Woods’ trainers introduced her to the golfer at a Manhattan nightclub.

During their affair, Woods told her he was bound to stand by his then pregnant wife to maintain his image.

Nike sticks by Tiger

Nike Inc Chairman and co-founder Phil Knight said the scandal surrounding Tiger Woods is “part of the game” in signing endorsement deals with athletes. Mr Knight did not back away from the athletic shoe and clothing maker’s relationship with the golfer.

Woods, 33, has admitted to “infidelity” in his marriage to his Swedish wife Elin Nordegren as allegations of multiple extra-marital affairs have rocked his life and career.

Mr Knight told Street & Smith’s Sports Business Journal that Nike checked out Woods’ background before signing its deal with the golfer and “he came out clean.”

Mr Knight’s comments were published following Woods’ surprise announcement Saturday that he would take an “indefinite break” from pro golf.

Mr Knight said companies cannot get such background checks right all the time and “there’s always a risk.”

However, he indicated no move to distance Woods from Nike, which has founded its global golf business on Woods’ reputation and play.

“I think he’s been really great,” Knight said in the interview published today.

“When his career is over, you’ll look back on these indiscretions as a minor blip, but the media is making a big deal out of it right now.”

Other sponsors have distanced themselves from Woods..

No ring

Meanwhile Nordegren has removed her wedding ring, fuelling speculation her marriage to Woods is already over.

Nordegren took her two children to a Christmas party in Florida on on 14 December 2009.

As she stopped for petrol it was clear she had taken off the gold band and diamond ring she has worn throughout their five-year marriage.

The outing came amid reports the family were visited by the child welfare authorities earlier in the day.

The agency workers – said to have been flanked by cops – normally call on families to ensure the well-being of children after domestic violence.

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Written by thecanadianheadlines

December 15, 2009 at 12:16 pm

Hollywood Madam reported to have set up Tiger’s £25,000 orgies with 15 ladies

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by Pete Samson

Cheating Tiger Woods splashed out £25,000 a weekend partying with high-class hookers, a notorious Hollywood madam told a U.S. website on 11 December 2009.

Michelle Braun (photo below and left) said that she sometimes provided Woods (photo below and right) with ten to 15 girls at one time.

Claims ... Michelle Braun Cheat ... Tiger Woods 
.'Favourite girl' ... Loredana 
Braun told E! News the golf star would call her to arrange meetings with girls as he left wife Elin Nordegren (photo above, referred to as Tiger’s ‘favourite girl’), 29, at home.  And she told a U.S. newspaper his favourite was stunning Playboy model Loredana Jolie.

 

Braun claimed Woods would spend £10,000 a time to meet Loredana, 26, in Manhattan.

But Loredana said only that she received “a ring, a pair of diamond studs and a watch” from Woods.

She added: “He came off as being a really nice person. He had manners.”

Braun also alleged two of the other women to have romped with Woods – porn star Holly Sampson and lingerie model Jamie Jungers – were on her books. 

Furious Jamie denied the claim. She said: “That’s 100 per cent false. I have never had anything to do with prostitution and never will.”

Escape ... staff prepared Woods' luxury yacht Escape … staff prepared Woods’ luxury yacht. 
Photos Credit: Big Pictures

 

And Holly’s lawyer said he had no knowledge of the fetish flick star working for Braun.

Braun said her girls told her Woods was “wild and a lot of fun”.

She added: “He liked girl-on-girl. He had sex with them together. He was tough to keep up with – days at a time on a booze and sex bender.”

Braun claimed Woods called her from different cities to organise girls.

She said: “He had a pretty big appetite for girls. Never just one girl. He would want to set up a whole weekend of partying and have ten or 15 girls 24/7.

“Mostly young, college cuties. In an average weekend in Las Vegas he’d probably spend $30,000 or $40,000.”

Last month Braun was sentenced to three years’ probation for money laundering and transporting a prostitute over state lines.

Rachel Uchitel – the first woman named as an alleged mistress of Woods – has threatened to sue after a TV host joked that she was a “hooker”.

Her lawyer Gloria Allred is representing another of Woods’ alleged mistresses, a woman in her 40s.

Yesterday his lawyers won a High Court injunction banning the UK publication of nude photos or sex tapes featuring him.

It came after a woman called a Florida radio station last week claiming to have snaps of him naked.

Woods has been in hiding since crashing his car two weeks ago. But he was thought to be about to surface last night as his staff prepared his luxury yacht at North Palm Beach, Florida.

Email for writer of article: p.samson@the-sun.co.uk

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Written by thecanadianheadlines

December 14, 2009 at 9:44 am

Universal Pictures presents Close Encounter of the Fourth Kind

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by T. S. Garp

Everyone is aware of the now classic 1977 film “Close Encounters of the Third Kind”, written and directed by Steven Spielberg. The film is about one man’s (Richard Dreyfuss) obsession after seeing a UFO (Unidentified Flying Object) and determine to meet the extraterrestrials despite the  government’s efforts to hide the fact that a landing is going to take place, making this the “first contact” encounter with peaceful beings.

But the public views on aliens have shifted over the years due to the recent reports coming in since 1980. UFO’s sightings are frequently reported worldwide. But reported encounters with aliens have turned into a much more darker and sinister tone. Either abduction cases have increased over the years or more people are simply reporting them, less fearful of ridicule than they were before. The newest film to address the issue is “The Fourth Kind”. Starring Milla Jovovich in a fact-based thriller about a psychologist investigating why an entire Alaskan town is besieged by strange alien-like visitors and unexplained disappearances. The real psychologist, Dr. Abigail Tyler, when dealing with traumatized patients would videotape the sessions, and the disturbing footage is integrated into the film revealing good evidence that something supernatural is happening here.

Weather one wants to believe in alien abduction as a real phenomenon or simply people having mass hysterics, the fact still remains that people are missing and survivors report the same terrifying M.O. ( modus operandi or method of operating) when encountering these aliens even breaking into their own homes and walking through walls. These type of creatures seem to be a common theme dating back thousands of years of similar reported cases.

Another compelling fact is that the FBI (Federal Bureau of Investigation) has reported that recently over the years that over 800,000 missing cases of people exist and that the number is steadily increasing each year. The FBI claims that up to 60% can be explained away by crime activity, but that the remainder is totally unsolved. The FBI has been at least impartially involved in UFO investigations since the 1940’s and animal mutilations (this phenomenon is associated with UFO’s and is still happening today) which were first reported during the late 1970’s, but the FBI’s early inquiry into the subject of UFO’s was stalled by the CIA and US military, to this day the FBI will not openly emit that the alien abduction phenomenon is real.

The United States government was very interested in UFO’s, especially the military and intelligence gathering agencies. Dr. J. Allen Hynek was an American astronomer and UFO researcher. He was working with the US Air Force involving UFO investigation starting back in 1948 on “Project Sign”. Other study groups like “Project Grudge” and “Project Blue Book”, all had Hynek as a leading investigator. Dr. Hynek is credited for developing in 1972 the classification term we use today for encountering UFO’s.

1. Close Encounter of the First Kind, a ground or aerial sighting, seeing objects in the sky, either odd lights or metallic objects flying beyond human technology.

2. Close Encounter of the Second Kind, physical evidence, deep impression in ground or soil, crop circles, radio signals blocked, and anything resembling physical damage to people or land due to exposure to high doses of radiation.

3. Close Encounter of the Third Kind, actually observing alien entities within or outside their craft and meeting them. The Steven Spielberg film is an entertaining and admirable attempt to show what happens when the government and local citizens encounter UFO occupants up close, making “first contact” in a friendly way.

4. Close Encounter of the Fourth Kind, this was added in later by other Ufologist who soon realized the growing rate of this type of encounter. Numerous case studies involving alien abduction where people encountered UFO’s and their occupants would be taken aboard the alien craft and forced medical examinations.

Ever since the Betty and Barney Hill abduction case psychologist have tried to understand this disturbing experience when encountering UFO’s. Ufologist like Budd Hopkins (who wrote “Intruders” in 1987) and Dr. Leo Sprinkle have done extensive research in UFO contactee and abductee cases. The difference is a contactee is meeting benign aliens who seem to have a spiritual message to give and an abductee is more a victim, taken against their will, and deeply traumatized. Well known author, Whitney Schreiber, wrote about his personal experiences involving alien abduction in his book Communion which was made into a film starring Christopher Walken.

Many abduction cases also involve the victims suffering from mysterious bruises, needle marks, scars, nightmares, frequent nose bleeds, missing time, a memory of looking at something that is really a different object, and deterioration of health. This is very real and fully documented. Who believes in this type of phenomenon? Psychotherapist, Ufologist, hypnotherapist, medical doctors, scientist, and of course the victims do. But the simple question is why? What purpose does it serve? Why is it happening? Who benefits? The Alaskan case which “The Fourth Kind” film is based on has since the 1960’s unexplained disappearances of people in that area. One should be open-minded to unheard of possibilities and ask the question: has this been going on throughout human history?

 internet site reference: LINK

Written by thecanadianheadlines

December 13, 2009 at 8:52 am

Emmy Award winner Insights: An Alien Agenda?

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by Tim Swartz

  UFO's
   

Our mass media is on an extraterrestrial kick. Watch any television or read any current magazine and you’ll usually find at least one reference to UFOs and their alien pilots. Print ad’s and TV commercials abound with the space aliens and their antics. It seems the popular notion is that UFOs (or Flying Saucers) are spacecraft from other planets. Many researchers no longer ask: “what are UFOs?” Instead they question, “What planet are they from?” But what do we really know about unidentified flying objects?

As any investigator of UFOs know, the phenomenon is multifaceted, it seems to first be one way, then suddenly another. People witness what appears to be unknown solid objects in the air that suddenly fade away like ghosts. Others come into contact with beings that seem to be from the unknown craft. These creatures come in all shapes and sizes, and claim to be from just about anywhere. There have been so many witnesses over the years that we can no longer simply dismiss all such sightings as mistakes, hoaxes or delusion. But neither can we simply except UFO’s at face value as visitors from other planets.

Strange sights in our skies is nothing new. For as long as we have had written records, reports of UFOs have been made. Strange entities are also not new to mankind’s history. Many such beings in the past have claimed to be from the heavens. Since the earliest times, mankind has felt that there must exist a mind superior to his own. Until now, Man has always thought of supreme beings in a religious context. That is why until the industrial revolution, sightings of UFOs and contacts with strange creatures were thought of as mystical experiences.

With ‘Science’ as the new religion, the former “Gods” and “Angels” have now turned into the “ET’s” and “Grays.” In fifty years we have witnessed the birth of a new religion, the church of interplanetary visitors. As with other religions, proof is not needed, only faith. What is it that has converted so many to the extraterrestrial dogma? From the very beginning of the modern UFO era (1947) some witnesses claimed to have been contacted by the occupants of the Flying Saucers. These creatures said they were from other worlds, usually planets from our own solar system.

The contactees were shown pictures of the home planets, some even claimed to have been taken to these other worlds. They were convinced their experiences were real. Not every UFO sighting led to an occupant sighting, nor did all entity sightings lead to communication with the witness.

During the Europe UFO flap of 1952, strange creatures, apparently associated with the UFOs were reported by witnesses. However, there was little actual communication between the beings and witnesses. Generally the stories were the same, the witness, while out at night, spots a strange metallic object on the ground, close by is seen one or several humanoids. After a few seconds the beings re-enter the object which then flies away. The entities sighted range in description from tall blond, blue-eyed humans, to short hairy dwarfs.

As time went by these creatures no longer ran away, but instead sought to communicate with people, usually to warn of the dire results of using atomic weapons. A favourite subject of aliens in the 1950’s. They also spoke of their home worlds, places of utopian peace and beauty, but now farther away, in other solar systems or as close by as the center of our hollow earth. Again the witnesses accepted what they heard as the truth. They spread the information through self-published pamphlets, books, radio talk shows and television. These contactees were universally laughed at and discredited. However, maybe we should have considered that the contactee had a real experience, but was then fed false information.

Emanuel Swedenborg once wrote: “when spirits begin to speak with man you should not listen to anything they say, for surely they will lie.” Perhaps our friends from the Flying Saucers are kin to the spirits that Swedenborg wrote of. “They tell such wondrous tales.”

What are we dealing with then? The UFO phenomenon does seem to be controlled; it does follow intelligent patterns. But the information given to us by the ufonauts is generally false, and is, perhaps, a deliberate smoke screen to cover-up what really is going on. Whatever the UFOs are up to, they are doing it on a world wide scale. And it’s inevitable that they should from time to time come in contact with some of us. When such contacts do occur, they deliberately hand out ridiculous information. Our belief systems are exploited. This whole mystery has been designed not only to keep us confused and sceptical, but to convince us that we are hosts to visitors from other planets. Someone is very interested in keeping this idea alive.

Starting in the 1970’s and continuing through the 90’s, the “Alien Abduction” story appears to be a recent development in the ever growing UFO mystery. Research has shown however, that this story has roots extending as far back as writings in ancient sumerian texts, to the books of the Bible. For years, people saying they’ve been snatched up by non-human entities has not been an uncommon occurrence. Perhaps one of the best researched incidents is the alleged abduction by aliens of Betty and Barney Hill. Their story is covered in the excellent book, The Interrupted Journey by John Fuller. The Hill’s experience would serve as a template as others over the years would report similar abductions.

The number of participants involved also increased. Whereas in the past, usually only one person was abducted, now reports of whole carloads of people being kidnapped have surfaced. In the 1980’s , abduction phenomenon changed from random encounters on dark roadways, to people being taken from their beds in the middle of the night. As more and more people came forward to tell of their encounters, similarities in the details became apparent.

What was interesting in the early days of abduction research, was that people who had no previous knowledge about UFOs were telling practically the same story. This was before the extensive media attention on abduction experiences, so it was unlikely that all the witnesses could have been influenced by the same outside sources.

Today the abduction stories along with the abductors have become ingrained in modern folklore. The stories and descriptions of the alleged aliens have become homogenized. The early stories saw a multitude of events and entities. Now the entities described almost always are what are now known as the “Grays.” Short humanoid creatures with grey skin, large heads, and huge black eyes. The UFO flaps in the fifties and sixties saw reports of all kinds of different creatures. Few past sightings have surfaced that coincide with recent descriptions of the grays.

Are we seeing a cultural condition? Or maybe some kind of human psychological bias? Entity reports from other countries continue to show a wide range of descriptions. This detail could enable us to better understand the nature of this mysterious phenomenon.

Of the case histories we’ve studied in this article, most are purely anecdotal, comprising witness testimony to an event for which that testimony generally constitutes the only evidence. It could be possible that every witness is either lying or deluded, even in those cases where more then one person, strangers to one another, report the same experience. I believe, though, that most of these reported cases really did, in some form, actually occur. What form that experience seemed to take, and what it’s real nature was, is another matter. In many cases, the witness offered no interpretation of their experience. They simply said what had happened to them and hoped others would explain it.

What are the facts with these cases? How are they being explained? Beings that seem to accompany UFOs are described by witnesses as short humanoids, tall beings, or even normal looking humans. Most of them do not match the standard descriptions that have been made so popular by rabid believers or by the media. This is the dilemma that faces modern UFO research. In the eagerness to grasp onto a few tentative patterns, which are often reinforced by bombarding witnesses with leading questions under hypnosis, many researchers actually select the cases that match their pre-existing expectations.

Naturally, this can lead to skewed results. However, there is a genuine UFO phenomenon. Years of research with thousands of witnesses over the years have convinced me of this fact. This phenomenon is not explained though by the revelations of alleged government agents. Nor by such UFO cult groups as Heavens Gate. The genuine UFO phenomenon appears to be associated with a form of non-human consciousness that manipulates space/time in ways we do not understand. Most researchers though, still cling to the notion that any non-human form of conscious must be from outer space.

The simple truth is if there is a form of life and consciousness that operates on properties of space/time we have not yet discovered, then it doesn’t have to be extraterrestrial. It could come from any place and from any time, even our own world. Past encounters with strange entities seem to show an almost personal connection with the witness. Personal beliefs of the witness appear to be known and exploited by the contacting beings. Before anyone had even heard of other planets we believed in fairies and sprites. We still have records of people who claimed encounters with these creatures, much like modern UFO encounters. Today we don’t believe in the wee folk. Yet the same basic phenomenon still occurs. It has just been dressed in more modern, space-aged clothes.

It is easy to speculate, everyone has their favourite theory. However, instead of letting personal theory control investigations, researchers instead need to listen to what is being said by the witnesses. Offer no explanations, because the phenomenon seems to conform to the participants expectations. Look at the evidence that has been gathered over the last one thousand years, not just the last fifty. What is being seen? What has been said? What is the real evidence that is being presented to us? Only through knowledge will we begin to understand the enduring mysteries in our skies.

About the writer:

Tim Swartz is an Indiana native and Emmy-Award winning television producer/videographer, and is the author of a number of popular books including: The Lost Journals of Nikola Tesla; Secret Black Projects; Evil Agenda of the Secret Government, Time Travel: A How-To-Guide, Teleportation: From Star Trek to Tesla; Strange and Unexplainable Deaths; and his most recent: Richard Shaver-Reality of the Inner Earth.

As a photojournalist, Tim Swartz has traveled the world, which has allowed him to investigate paranormal phenomena and other unusual mysteries. He has worked with PBS, ABC, NBC, CBS, CNN, ESPN, Thames-TV and the BBC. His articles have been published in magazines such as Mysteries, FATE, Strange, Atlantis Rising, UFO Universe, Renaissance, and Unsolved UFO Reports. Most recently Tim has become the Associate Publisher for Mysteries Magazine and is the host of the paranormal podcast: Mystery Tour: Investigating the Unknown.

As well, Tim Swartz is the writer and editor of the Internet newsletter Conspiracy Journal; a free, weekly e-mail newsletter, considered essential reading by paranormal researchers worldwide. Check out his website, LINK. Email Tim at LINK or, LINK.

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Written by thecanadianheadlines

December 9, 2009 at 10:19 pm